Dust of Dreams......

                                                   Life is just like a dust...

                                                       A dust of dreams...



                                              Dreams that are so tender...

                                              Dreams that are so fragile...



                                             Dreams that are for eternity...

                                                 And some for a while...



                                           Dreams that give birth to hope...

                                      Dreams that encourage, never to stop...



                                           Dreams that are truly mine...

                                           But with you just beautify...



                                                       You and me...

                                                    Together as we...



                                                In hopes, in dreams...

                                                Like waves in seas...



                                             No difference between...

                                                 No space between...



                                   Just like, we were never Me and You...

                                                    But us forever...

 .

Everyday is a MOTHER'S DAY.....

   

                  With one never starts a thing but two. Two people make a couple - make parents , make a start. When I was only me, I would not think of others much as much I thought for myself.But after I got married to your father, I realized life is so much happier, when you have someone to share your blessings, your laughter, your achievements, even your pain and grief.



                  With the news of your arrival, I learned to Hope for the best, dream about the new life, I'll have with you,my own flesh and blood.I learned Patience to see you in my arms. And also taking care of myself for you.Your father and  I share so many moments of those nights, when we would think of names, color of your eyes, the way you'll call us by your little words and so much more.





                   And finally, when you arrived, we just felt like after a long hot day,the drops of rain have fallen to quench the thirst of the  dry land.I forgot the pain, yes the pain,which is said to be the greatest in the world. I got you in my arms and I felt the love for you making me forget everything and everyone around.



                   Your eyes, your sweet smiles, cries, your holding my hand, keeping close to me made me learn the importance of being there for you. You taught me dear to be there when you needed me. When you tried to sit and finally made it, taught me your desire to achieve. When you crawled on your knees, made me know you wanted to excel even though you were small to understand. When you walked finally, your achievement, I sensed the victory in your eyes, on your face.



                    Dear, at nights, when you slept, I watched over you, feeling pleased that you are safe, you are well. Today, I understand, why my mom used to say that children are the world.My small world started with you and I am really happy to have you in my life.



                    The day, I knew you were coming, I felt like God, a universe was in the making, inside me. Every day and every month, you grew inside me, making me realize, how God is said to be around us and inside us. You made me a goddess dear, I felt like one, the power of a god to create life, I understood the process of creation, amazing is the work of God, so continues and so magical. Such a magical feeling it is, to be a mother.



                     When you were born, a part of me was born in You. Who says we live only once???But the fact is I live in You too.After I am no more, I will live as You. Yes dear, this is how life moves forward.I have given you what I had and You have taught me most of the things in life.And though only a day is celebrated as Mother's Day, I say for mothers, everyday is a MOTHER'S DAY.





                   

Life and Love....

Is this Life?

Yes.....





Can I watch over till you hold me?

Am sorry!!!



I mean, can I come along?

Sure....but who is this?





I am Love. Don't you know me?

NO.





What???? That's strange.

I only know Death....





Great, I know her too, that evil lady....

Evil?



Yes, she steals everyone from me. Evil Witch.....

Sorry, but she is my bride....





Ohhhh!!!! Ok! Ok! I get it......She stole you too from me.

Am getting late.....You are on your own





Bye(sobbing)

Bye.







 

Bathed in Pain

                    I was always envious of my mother. She was very beautiful. No one could stand her charm and grace, that is what I always thought.On that day, when she stood next to me at the bus stand for my school bus, it was the last time she came out with me.I remember clearly, I was 6 that time in class I. She was wearing a floral printed pink saree, when two men on their motorbike came near us.They had an unusual look of hatred and anger on their faces. Before we could understand, one of them took out a bottle with something in it. In a flash the whole solution was on my mamma's beautiful face.She pushed me behind like she knew what they threw and faced all what fate had  in store for her.





                   Those men raced their bikes and were nowhere to be seen.Only my mamma's screeches were what I heard then. People were just watching the show, but no one came forward to help her or me.I could not understand what was going on. Then somebody called an ambulance and that old uncle accompanied me to the hospital. He took my dad's number and informed him too. At the hospital, the doctors were just doing their job, no one was telling what happened. My father sent me to my granny's house . He thought I will not be able to bear my mamma's new face.







                    After 6 months I returned home.The time I lived with my granny was very tiring. I wanted to see my mother very badly. I insisted and finally got home. My mamma was in her room, the room was dark, the lights were off. My Dad didn't allow me to go in her room. He tried to explain me that my mamma was in depression and pain. Those people attacked her with acid which burned her face that I was so envious of. I assured that I won't make noise or disturb her. I went inside slowly, she was there, sitting and looking at a vase with roses. She noticed me and called aloud my name " Manjari, Manjari". It was  then I saw the horror. I saw her face was just like a shattered glass. Her eyes, they sunk inside and half of her face was with scars. I wasn't afraid but I was sad to see that my beautiful mamma was in so much pain and I left her alone when she needed me the most. I ran to her. She hugged me tight.Tight to her chest, I could hear her heartbeat.She was sobbing, calling out my name again and again."Oh Manjari, my child where were you? How are you? I missed you so much. I longed to see you. I thought may be I will die without seeing you. But look here are you. Just don't leave me , just don't."







                     I had no words I was crying and my tears were unstoppable when my Dad scolded me and brought me out of the room. I wasn't frightened of my mamma's face but I was angry why it happened with her. Why?I did not get my answers then, because I was a kid . But that incident hollowed me from inside. It was like I lost a jewel so precious. But I love her more than ever and I just want to say that people who did that to her were no more than ugly themselves.Whatever may be the reason for their hatred but it was not any solution for their unfulfilled intentions. Issues can be resolved but can they give back her lost face and her self confidence???

Who am I?

        Who am I?  Somebody's daughter, somebody's sister, somebody's girlfriend, somebody's wife,

somebody's mother. But who is the real ME?  Relationships hold me, never letting me know, never letting me understand, never letting me recognize who am I?

               I am a girl, a woman, but is my identity only this? 



There is so much to reveal, so much to share, and so much to find and know. The scriptures say YOU CAN KNOW THE WORLD, BUT THE PERSON WHO CAN KNOW HIMSELF IS VERY DIFFICULT TO FIND. FOR FINDING THE SELF IS FINDING THE DIVINE (GOD) HIMSELF AND HIS WAYS. Very true, people want to find GOD. Finding or knowing GOD and ourselves is very difficult because we are very  unpredictable  in nature. People say that you can find about someone through his body language but I don't think so. That is circumstantial.

                Knowing myself is to spend time with myself. But days and nights seem to be too short period for that. I have time for worldly matters but for myself none. How ironic! Well, such is LIFE. Buddha got Nirvana in Bodhgaya under a Banyan tree where his soul found the divine, where he came to know the unknown. We fear the unknown,  for we are troubled not with what happens but from the outcome of the happening.

                I am bound with chains unseen. I feel the clutches hard to break, I want to be free,  free of these ghosts. Sometimes I feel Life is just a cycle moving in one direction. Happy moments are behind and sad ones are also moving far, I am moving towards DEATH without knowing why was I here and who I was............